Today when I got back to my sorority house from class, I hungrily marched down to our kitchen and piled my plate high with barbecue pulled pork for lunch. It tasted delicious until I noticed the bright orange puddle of grease swirling around my empty plate. I suddenly wanted to puke. Over Thanksgiving break I binge ate and drank everything in my grasp. I gleefully stuffed my puffy face with cinnamon rolls, stuffing, pumpkin pie, casseroles, mashed potatoes, turkey, rolls with globs of butter, and cranberry sauce, all topped off with heaping ladles of gravy. Nothing was spared, and no fatty treat went untouched. My greasy lunch was an unpleasant reminder of my recent indulgences.
I felt frumpy, lumpy, and blah and knew I needed to do something about the bloated blob that hardly resembled my former pre-Thanksgiving self. As I sat on my couch contemplating my options, I noticed a book collecting dust on the bottom of my bookshelf. Ah, The Ultimate New York Body Plan by David Kirsch, the trainer who got Heidi Klum back to her svelte self after she had children. Last time I tried Kirsch’s two-week body plan, I sort of wanted to die. His workouts were miserable and I was so sore I could barely move. However, I'm detoxing, not working off baby weight, so I decided I could follow the diet part, but create my own daily workouts. In case you could use a little help in the health department, too, all you have to remember is to cut out the ABC’s: Alcohol, Bread, Carbs, Dairy, Excess fat, and Fruits (because of the high sugar content.) Even though I'm dumming down the original plan, it's still going to be friggin hard. I hate working out and I joyously consume each of these banned foods daily. So if you’re having a bad day and need to laugh at someone else’s pain, I’ll be blogging about my progress throughout the week. Feel free to check in on me!
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